Kids have gone to school.  House is silent.  Twins are gone for heart check up.  Sitting still I started to realise that I disappeared into just being present in my motionless solitude.  A state of waiting.  I really have nothing to do but wait until they come home, alone all purpose disappears.  All that is left of me is existence.  Nothing matters to me personally other than being of service, without that I would quietly sit here and die.  I have noticed no desire to eat, or wash myself.  Going to the toilet is my only chore, who or what I thought I was has disappeared.  I have no name, no nationality, no culture.  I am just still like many things waiting to be of service.  I am nothing more than the immune and nervous system of the world, when there is nothing to look after and protect, I am just here.
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